Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Dumb and Dumber

Sorry folks, but I'm going to need a little help deciding which is the most retarded thing I've heard in the last few months.


Anonymous: So what do you guys use for money in Australia? The Euro?

Zander: WHAT? The in the European dollar??

Anonymous: Whatever, shut up. I figured maybe you guys had it cause Australia is part of the Commonwealth.

Zander: Oh my god. What does the Commonwealth have to do with anything? Even Britain doesn't use the Euro.

Anonymous: Really?


Zander (reading trivia): What was the first country to give women the right to vote?

Person #1: Australia?

Zander: No, but you're close!

Person #2 (thinking VERY hard): Um...hmmm...

Zander: Yes?

Person #2: Africa?

Zander: *speechless*

For the record, the answer to that question was New Zealand. Fine if you didn't know it, but I'm hoping that the vast majority of people would a) guess an actual country b) if they were to guess a continent (you know, just for kicks), maybe pick one where most people, men or women, can currently vote.

I also last week had to explain to a good friend (who is a freaking investment banker) that you lose money when you convert currency and that it is not, in fact, a free service that the government provides out of the goodness of their hearts. The best part is that I'm not sure she believed me at the end...


emla said...

Ooo, ooo! I have a good one:

Friend [in elevator]: Ugh, that beeping is so annoying. I think they put it in there so that deaf people know what floor they're on.

Zander said...

Oh, you are too funny.

However let's not pretend that me saying "deaf" instead of "blind" in a drunken stupor is remotely on the same level as the ignorance in my examples.

Thanks dear.


P.S. Die.

Guess who? said...

Let's not forget these jems:

1. Sex is pink.

2. Trivial Pursuit's Genious Edition.

3. The Middle East- That's like the Middle Ages.

Ben said...

Number 1. By far. At least #2 both started with A. Although, I'm a bit drunk, so I might be confused.

Come check out the new digs--I'm remodeling. Also, I'm going into business for myself, and I finally figured out how to market the bitch. See you soon!

Anonymous said...

Haha okay whoever is " Guess who?"
is wrong with their number three.
The convo went something like
#1: " Yeah he was in some movie about the middle eastern times"
#2: "Middle Eastern times? I'm guessing you mean the Middle Ages?"
#1: oh yeah...the middle ages!

Yes drunken moments on Australia Day although i don't think we were that drunk then!

Zander said...

Actually I think "Guess who?" is someone from NY, which makes it even funnier that apparently I've known at least two people who have confused the Middle East and the Middle Ages.

Please let me know about this Australia Day idiocy at your earliest convenience, "anonymous".

emla said...

Eh, it's ok, at least one of us was funny that weekend.