Thursday, March 30, 2006

I Have A Candidate For Next Season

There's a massively fat guy in my office. Seems like a nice person and all, but I think he's one of those people who is so fat he has trouble breathing sometimes.

Now we all know I've never been hugely sympathetic to the plight of the obese, but I think even you guys would agree that if you're a solid 300 lbs plus, you would at least consider NOT having certain items on your desk at all times. Namely, a salt-shaker, a loaf of bread, and a bucket of butter. Honestly, am I being judgemental here? Okay well yes I am, but isn't it warranted??

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In other fatty news, I saw the gay guy from Australia's Biggest Loser waddling down the street the other day. They didn't actually say he was gay, but his first sentence on the show was "My mother is my best friend" and he spent his few weeks on the show mincing around the house and bitching about everyone behind their backs, so I think TOTAL HOMO is a good call on this one.

Anyway, I believe my original point was -- he's still fat.



Joe said...

dude arent u worried about being dooced since your drunken mugshot is plastered just two posts behind this one? couldn't this morbidly obese dude somehow run across your blog? eh, who am i kidding, no one reads your blog 'cept me.

Vicki said...

Now that's just not true. Whenever I'm good and sloshy I head over to the blog. OK, that's not true either. Work's been super slow lately and I check your blog for new comments like every hour on the hour. And the one day I actually left a comment, every time I came back I was like "Ooooh! Comment!" and stupidly clicked on it just to end up reading my own comment. And that's not only depressing for obvious reasons, but also because comments seem so funny when you write them but once they're set in stone they tend to be kinda lame and you wish no one would read them. Maybe I should stop commenting when I'm drunk. Also, I should really stop IM'ing my boss when I'm drunk and calling him sweetcakes.

Jonathan said...

There are fat people in Australia? Why did you move there?