Yes so, yesterday was Day Two, and I spent half of it looking through resumes and design portfolios because I'm expected to interview candidates for a graphic designer position tomorrow. At first this made me a little nervous, since the only questions I could think to ask were "On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate your tolerance?" and "Assuming you're a bit dressed up for us now, how much hotter can you look on a regular basis?".
Of course any intimidation evaporated when I started looking through the hilarity contained in candidates resumes.
Props to "Gary", who chose to start every paragraph in his cover letter in the third person, but then revert to the first person after two or three sentences. Made even more hysterical when he accidentally called himself "Gay" at the beginning of the second page. Almost made up for having to read the longest cover letter EVER.
And snaps to a girl I will call "Ling Ling", who represented for the Asian community. Now I hate to be one to make fun of anyone's language skills, considering I have such a pathetic grasp on the ones I claim to speak on my own resume, but this was great. You know how sometimes you see those random products from Japan and the catch phrases that make little to no sense? Imagine an entire resume in that style. Still laughing at "[Ling Ling], always be willing to realise your target in a fantastic way." There was also another part where she referred to herself as a 'terrible weapon' against graphic design or something along those lines. God knows what my new employees thought of me cackling to myself at my desk, but I swear it was worth it.
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Gay's cover letter is along the same lines as this one chick who had much experience in Pubic Relations. Dear god, I don't even want to know what that is. But the best had to be at my old job when this guy sent in his resume with track changes still accidentally on and one of the original bullet points was "insert bullshit here". I mean, seriously, that had to have been a prank.
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