Every now and then you're lucky enough to be associated with someone who is so much of a drunk that you feel infinitely better about your own drinking habits.
For example...do you know how every city or town has that bar, the place where you can do whatever the fuck you want, and no one cares? Where people break shit, and everyone applauds. Where you can pass out on the floor in your own vomit (a mix of 10 cent wings and the cheapest beer on this side of the Atlantic), and the bartenders will just laugh at you and then go back to whatever they were doing before.
In New York, one such place is Off The Wagon, an NYU bar that you generally shouldn't be seen in after the age of 22.
So how my 25 year old friend managed to get kicked out of Off The Wagon still remains a mystery. Or as he put it, "i must have taken a shit behind the bar or something. i mean really, what do you have to do to get ejected from that joint". So true.
Either way, I feel much better about my own life, and justified in drinking more than usual this weekend. Three cheers for rationalization, kids.