So I've just finished Day 2 at the new job. Naturally I still have no idea what's going on and have yet to lay my hands on any real work, but here are my first impressions:
This job will make me fat - No, really. I can't believe the amount of free food at my fingertips on a daily basis. If there's a meeting, there will be full catering. And at any time of the day there is a fridge on each floor full of soft drinks and what not, not to mention jars full of cookies, biscuits, and lord knows what else. (There's also fruit, but who are we kidding here?) Considering it took me years to go from drinking 6 cans of Coke a day to having one a week or less, I'm pretty upset that I'm was sitting at my desk drinking one just because it was free and within reach.
There are SO many people here - Perhaps a naive observation, especially considering that I specifically wanted to come work at a large company. But it's odd knowing that I will NEVER recognize everyone even on my floor, forget the entire Sydney office of 1200 people. And at least when you know everyone you can laugh off things like pouring water down the front of your pants on your second day. Now I'm surrounded by strangers who just look at me like an idiot.
What do you mean I have to account for my time? - Possibly one of the scariest things I'll have to do while I'm here is fill in a weekly timesheet, which companies like this make every single person do, from support up to directors. Sorry, but considering how easily distracted I am, there is going to be a lot of time that I am going to have to pretend I used doing something else. But that seems to be the general practice, so I guess I will simply need to get over my guilt at the thought of billing clients for more time than we actually used. (Or I could just be more focused...I'll give that shot too, promise.)
To drink or not to drink - I guess this isn't different from most other offices, especially in Australia, but I have to say that having an HR policy that says you should never be drunk on company premises is a little confusing when there are clearly cases of beer, Bacardi Breezers and wine stacked so high in the kitchen you'd think they were preparing for the last party on Earth. And I've been advised that 4.30pm on Fridays is when everyone in my division goes to a conference room and drinks until they feel like heading out to a bar. Mixed signals, anyone? At least my previous company had us continue to pretend to do work while we drank on Friday afternoons.
In the end I'm not complaining though. True, the 4 hours of training on my first morning was mind-numbingly boring, but it was expected. And now I'm sitting at a desk where I just have to turn my head to the left and I have a view of the Sydney Opera House, which mostly makes up for no longer having a big office to myself. And let's face it, it's the second day of this gig, so I won't really know if I like it or not until I'm a good 6 months in. I won't even try to contemplate how many biscuits, cans of Coke, and alcoholic beverages they will force me to consume in that time, but there's a good chance I won't be the picture of health by the time I'm done at this company...
6 comments:
Hey Zander, do you have any idea what happened to the Zack Sucks blog?
Haha, funny story. You know how Zack is the biggest tool ever? He actually filed a complaint with Blogger/Google over copyright infringement, and their policy is just to take down the blog instead of investigating it further, so Zack Sucks is no more. Damn shame.
Hey, I've been lurking for a while. I just wanted to tell you I really enjoy your blog. It is refreshing.
I think the positives outweigh the negatives in this one, old chap. Congrats on securing a fine, fine job.
Are they hiring?
Hypmommy - Thanks! Would you say it's more refreshing like a cold beer on a summer's day, or a vodka tonic on the rocks in a warm bar in the middle of winter? (You don't actually have to answer that)
DJS - Yeah, it almost sounds like I'm bitching a little, but it seems like a pretty sweet deal. If any positions open up for Sarcastic Blogger, I will let you know.
The trick to timesheets is to just put any time you can't account for in overhead. Blogging? Overhead. Catching up on thesuperficial.com? Overhead. Drinking? Overhead. Explaining the most recent reason Zack sucks? Overhead. Works every time.
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