Tuesday, November 01, 2005

No Halloween For Zander :(

*Apologies for the weird spacing and layout, Blogger's giving me a hard time and I don't love any of you enough to mess around with it for one more second of my life.

Yup, that's right. As awesome and fantastically fun as the Aussies are, they don't really do Halloween, and there's nothing I can say to convince them otherwise. When I try to describe how amazing Halloween in NYC is, and explain how it's the one occasion that I'm probably most upset about missing while I'm here, they just look at me and go "But, why?"

Various people back home have suggested that I just dress up and go out and start my own Halloween, and think that everyone will stare at me. Um, folks, I think I need to remind you -- I'm in a country where they swear on the radio, naked people are used to advertise real estate and lemonade, transvestites are more common on the streets than homeless people, and Queer As Folk is considered appropriate for network primetime viewing. This past Sunday afternoon, I was at a nearby shopping center and I walked by an older bald guy wearing a purple Sunday dress and a hat, muttering to himself and swinging an umbrella around at the same time. And about an hour later I was walking down the street and a bus driver honked at me and flipped me the bird for NO REASON WHATSOEVER. And you really think anyone would bat an eyelid if I put on a silly costume and walked around? I think not.

Actually that's why I think Australians are so nonchalant about the whole Halloween thing. Every weekend is Halloween here, in one way or another.

Anyway, I've just finished looking through everyone's pictures from Halloween in NYC, and although I'm a bit depressed that I wasn't around to share in the revelry, I thought I'd post a few here:

This one is just vulgar and offensive. Therefore I love it. And of course half of the album was every female in the party striking a lewd pose with this guy.

Colin, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, in what might have to win my Favourite Costume award this year. Extra points because he apparently threw it together in like an hour.

Isn't it great how this scene is so common, and yet so fucking hilarious every single time? Lookin' sharp, Varghese. Emla claims he was able to just wipe it off when he woke up, which leads to my conclusion that all Indians have dry-erase skin. Discuss.

And this guy on the right wins my WTF award for 2005. If I had to guess, I'd say he's supposed to be a serial rapist/murderer with shitty taste in beer. Any other guesses?

Alas, all I can do is send all of these pics to my Aussie friends and hope they can catch just a glimmer of the best thing that's ever happened to anyone anywhere. And start planning my costume for next year. Jess, we are totally gonna be slaves.

1 comment:

The Black Nation said...

We took a vote and decided to rescind your membership based on future Halloween engagements. Please turn in your Afro pic, cocoa butter and dashiki as soon as possible. Thank you.